Eat dessert first
Friday, October 19, 2007 - posted by hellomynameisscott at 5:42 AM
I speak at a lot of conferences.Naturally, I often find myself seated at meals with strangers.
And naturally, I often find myself face to face … with delicious pieces of cake.
See, at most conferences, the banquet staff is instructed to place the dessert on the table before the meal starts.
I’m not sure why they do this. Probably just to tempt people.
Anyway, I’ve always had kind of a sweet tooth. So, I usually snag my piece of cake as soon as I sit down and dig right in.
AND HERE’S THE WEIRD PART: every time I do this, the other people at the table almost always react strangely.
They look at me like I'm crazy. Or they laugh. Or they stare.
And I’m like, “What?”
“Are you eating your dessert FIRST?”
“Um, yyyyyeah … is that a problem for you?”
“No, it’s just that you don’t usually see people doing that.”
Hmm. Now why do you think that is? I wondered.
Right. Because that’s what we’ve ALWAYS been taught: dessert comes last.
And, look. Here's the thing: I don’t choose to eat my dessert first so I can get attention.
I just REALLY love cake.
So, what fascinates me is that people don’t make comments in a reprehensible tone, but rather in an astonished tone.
Like they can’t believe someone just did this!
“Psst,” they chillingly say to the person next to them, “that guy’s eating his dessert first!”
I don’t know. I guess some people are just SO shocked when they see a mainstream pattern being broken, they can’t help but be taken aback.
Because there’s just too much dissonance.
For example, I sat down to lunch after a recent speech in Chicago.
And the dessert looked AMAZING: Chocolate Mousse with Oreo crust and peanut butter whipped cream.
Seriously, how do you NOT eat that first?
So I started eating it. And a few bites in, the guy across the table starts starring at me.
And after a few seconds, do you know what he did?
He grabbed his cake and started eating it too!
ALAS! THE ONCE INSURMOUNTABLE BARRIER OF CONFERENCE DESSERTS HAD BEEN CONQUERED.
And then, this was the best part. I swear to God, I’m not making this up:
The woman next to me grabs her cake.
She takes ONE bite, savors the deliciousness and then grabs my arm and says:
“Scott … thank you for giving me the courage to eat my dessert first.”
For real. In the most sincere tone possible, she actually said that.
So, here’s my question:
LET ME ASK YA THIS...
What lessons does this story imply?
LET ME SUGGEST THIS...
Post them here! And then go eat some dessert.
* * * *
Scott Ginsberg
That Guy with the Nametag
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Labels: eat dessert first, totally random stuff
Maybe they put it on the table just trying to find out who will eat the dessert first!
Perhaps if we understood that as long as we ate our veggies, we could eat dessert first more people would eat dessert first. But that is the fear, people are scared that they won't have enough room for veggies after dessert.
It takes a daring person to challenge convention.
What a great post, and on my birthday, no less.
I resolve to eat my dessert first more often this year, as nothing annoys me more than not having enough room left for chocolate!
Jen
Uh-oh. Next thing you know you'll be facing the backs of elevators and fomenting revolution.
(I think they put it there to save a service, but I'm a cynic.)
By the way, I might be the last person to have seen these (19 million views) but this "free hugs" campaign kind of reminds me of you--people going outside the box, challenging things:
http://chrisbrogan.com/video-is-power-chords/#comments
Amazing, powerful stuff.
Scott,
People are so ... stuck.
Whenever I'm giving a multi-day course to a bunch of people I observe the same phenomenon. No matter how long the interval is from the first session to the second, people almost always sit in the same chair as last time.
At a seminar the other day, I stood up on day 2 and asked one person (he looked thick-skinned enough to take the jibe) "Did you pee on your chair before you left here yesterday?" He was so astonished, I had to repeat the question three times, before he stammered out his response, "No!" (Obviously not as thick-skinned as I had thought).
"Well," I said, "if you didn't mark your territory in the traditional doggie way, why are you so hung up on sitting in the same spot? Why is EVERYONE here sitting in the same seat they were in yesterday?"
Thankfully, I got a laugh and they got the point and spontaneously started swapping places to get a different perspective with different neighbours to their right and left.
People are so ... stuck
@Rowan: GREAT way to provoke new perspectives.
I've adopted "life is uncertain, so eat dessert first" as something of a motto. Why postpone delight? Why be a sheep?
Thanks, Scott, for another kick-in-the-pants post.
great story, and told well too!
I guess that is the same process as with the nametag - something unusual, maybe we are programmed to shame for such actions, but It's so human and unusual...
more examples, please! /free hugs is great one, I did it!!!
That story screams CONFORMITY!
Which reminds me of the 5 monkeys, a banana and a water hose story.
Seriously, the monkey story backs up Scott's "break the pattern" advice.
Monkey Story
I LOVE IT!! What a great story!
Quite an example of Adultitis free living!
Jason and I have found that when your inner child comes out to play, it's often surprising to other people, but as you showed, it's also contagious. Your example gave others the permission to do something fun, even if it's not the "norm." You rock, Scott!
I was a dinner rebel not too long ago. It's definitely something my mom never allowed as a kid. You gotta enjoy the perks of adulthood!
I like the idea, and I wouldn't do it. Why, because I'm controlling my weight via choices. For me, eating that yummy cake is tasty, but I risk filling up and not eating the healthy stuff. Hmmm. I could only eat *part* of it, though.
Thanks for the tip!
Rowhan-
I got reprimanded on a bus tour because when we got back on the bus my wife and I moved toward the front. This gang of ladies told us we could not do that and had to go back to our original seats. They made me and my pregnant wife move to the back. I felt like I was in Jr High again.
I always try to move around and change seats to get new perspectives, but it makes other people uncomfortable.
Scott-
I make my daughter Isabella (3) eat her dinner first otherwise she would only eat desert. I think that is where this habit comes from for most of us- but that does not mean I need to stick with it at 37.
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